Staying hydrated:
[The AI’s take on “Ordinary schmuck enjoying a cool drink of water on a hot day.”]
Since time immemorial, man has slaked his thirst by putting a crude admixture consisting of two hydrogen atoms and one oxygen atom inside of him. At first, in the caveman days, he’d happen upon a stream, cup his hands, and gulp, sometimes under the watchful gaze of a chicken:
[From here.]
Eventually he figured out the drinking vessel:
And then the straw so he wouldn’t have to put his lips on the vessel:
[From here.]
And from there we were off to the races:
Literally:
Even so, today the act of drinking remains frustratingly primitive, and if you’re like me you’ve often thought to yourself, “If only there were a phone app and an expensive piece of equipment to help me accomplish this.” Well finally humanity has reached the next long overdue phase in beverage consumption. Behold, the backpack that drinks for you!
I checked the date of this article at least fifteen times, and every time I was astonished to find it was not April 1st:
Here’s a closer look at the system:
Pinkbike really seems to like this thing, too:
So does this confirm what many of us have long suspected, that mountain bikers are literally too dumb to drink?
It would certainly appear so:
I mean check out the video, it literally squirts the water at your face:
So basically it’s the exact opposite of that thing at the dentist that sucks the saliva out of your mouth. What happens if you’re in the middle of talking to a friend or something when it’s time for your next drink? Does it just blow its load in your face? Is there some sort of emergency cut-off, or are we about to see a spate of on-the-bike drowning deaths among the helmet-visor-and-baggy-short set? No idea, but for under $500 you too can get in on the hot new water microdosing trend:
Speaking of mountain bikes, I rode a bike with a suspension fork yesterday:
After spending so much time on the Roadini which gets its smooth ride the natural way (long wheelbase and wide tires) the Y-Foil felt kind of weird and disjointed, though enjoyable nonetheless. By the way, the crown race and the headset aren’t a perfect match, and while they work together just fine there’s a tiny gap there that leaves the bearings slightly exposed. So to spare them from grit I installed this high-tech device, which seemed appropriate for a vintage RockShox product:
It’s like a headband for the head tube, and it gives the bike a little sporty late 20th century flair:
Meanwhile, back here in the 21st century, Project 105 moves incrementally forward:
Of course, the Milwaukee takes medium-reach brakes, and Shimano 105 only comes in short. I had just planned to keep using the brakes that were already on there, but I was pleasantly surprised to find that Ben’s Cycle included these:
I will of course be holding onto the originals though:
Not only are they excellent, but I don’t think Shimano even makes this model anymore, so now that medium-reach road bikes are the new gravel bike it’s only a matter of time before their value goes through the roof.
And if you think the new parts make for too much black, I get it, but never question my commitment to silver. For that matter, never question my commitment to adequacy, because apart from the brakes this thing is 105 right down to the hubs!
All that’s really left to do now are the cables and the chain:
Maybe I’ll even have it rolling by the weekend.
